​     With a national population of around 330 million people, roughly one-third are anxious in some kind of way. Anxiety can be situational. Why can’t I find a parking space near my store? Anxiety can me chronic. What if nobody likes me? What if this job is wrong for me? Mentalligent psychotherapy (MPT) is a means of treating both types of anxiety.
          After giving your patient an ample opportunity to explore his anxiety and share with you how it affects him, using empathy and affective listening, I start my intervention sequence.
          “Okay, Kyle,” I began prepping him for changing his thinking. “Let me give you some tidbits to chew on that will help rid you of your debilitating anxiety.”
          “Sure, Doc,” he replied eagerly. “Go for it.”
          “First, close your eyes, breathe deeply and rhythmically, and focus on my directions.” Kyle took a deep breath as he nodded to me.
          “Take your left hand from your side and extend it out shoulder height.” He did so.
          “Take your right hand from your side and extend it out shoulder height.” He did so.
          “Now, with your arms extended, lower them slowly to rest together down in front of you.” Kyle lowered both arms, and then took another deep, slow breath. He then opened his eyes and smiled.
          “What you’ve just done, Kyle, is limit your experience of both your anxiety and your depression.”
          He looked at his hands clasped together in front of him. “Really, how so?”
          “Our experience of depression typically comes from past events we have internalized. Our experience of anxiety typically comes from the negative anticipation we have for our yet unknown future.”
          “Okay…” Kyle tentatively understood.
          “By physically moving the position of your arms from by your side to in front of you, you symbolically chose to live in the now or the moment. In essence, you said to yourself, ‘I will not let my negative history hold me back, nor do my unforeseen future keep me from moving forward.’ Staying in the now can be very freeing. Your feelings have nowhere to root and nowhere to grow.
          We talked more about how living mindfully can help him overcome his anxiety, until I felt he was beginning to embrace the concept.
          “Now, Kyle, let’s tackle your anxious feelings. What are you telling yourself when you get anxious?”
          “Well, let’s see,” he pondered my challenge. “Uh, what if I’m late for work again? What if I don’t get along with Mandy’s, that’s my girlfriend, parents? What if I can’t pay my bills? How’s that for a start?
          “That’s great,” I reassured. Now, stay with me here, I’m going to turn each of your ‘what if’ questions into ‘I wonder’ curiosities. Ready? Follow me here.”
          Kyle nodded in agreement.
          “I wonder how I will plan to be on time for work tomorrow. I wonder how I will win Mandy’s parents over. I wonder how I can budget my money better. Do you see what I did there?
          “I think so,” Kyle thought it through. “You turned my questions into statements. You changed my ‘what if’s’ into ‘I wonder’s.’ Is that right?”
          “Yep. Curiosity beats anxiety every time. But also, notice I included something else. The curiosity statement generates action to cure the anxiety.”
          “I don’t follow.”
          “Let’s take the first ‘what if.’ What if I’m late for work tomorrow? It becomes, I wonder how I will plan to be on time tomorrow. There’s a positive subliminal message to yourself embedded in there, that is, ‘I will be on time for work tomorrow.’ I then directed Kyle to unpack the subliminal messages in his next to “I wonder” statements.
          “Great! I think you are getting it, Kyle. You see, as you well know, the feeling of anxiety is constricting, limiting, and binding. The feeling of curiosity, however, is expanding, freeing, and generates boundless possibilities.”
          As a behavioral prescription, I asked Kyle to write down at least 5 “what if” questions that he encountered between his sessions with me. Then pair each with an “I wonder” statement with a positive presuppositional phrase embedded in it.
          When treating anxiety with MPT, you can set the stage with mindfulness, channel positive energy into the healing process, and use cognitive behavioral strategies to challenge your patient’s thinking and change his behaviors. When your patient confronts his anxiety, coach him into switching questions from “what if?” to “I wonder.”
Blessings,
Jon

This is a guest commentary by Lily Tamrick. She can be reached at [email protected]
The Parent’s Guide to Cultivating a Thriving Learning Environment. Nurturing a passion for knowledge in our children is essential for their development and success in an ever-evolving world. As parents, our role extends beyond providing basic needs; it involves sparking and maintaining an intrinsic desire to learn. This commitment to fostering an environment rich in educational opportunities and support prepares our children for academic success and a lifetime of curiosity and growth. THEREFORMYKIDS.COM shares more insights.
Create a Learning Oasis at Home. Designating a particular area in your home for reading, studying, and creative endeavors is crucial. This space should be comfortable, quiet, and equipped with the tools your child needs to explore their academic and creative interests. Establishing a dedicated learning environment encourages a structured approach to learning and creativity. A designated space helps children associate this area with knowledge and creativity, seamlessly integrating learning into their daily lives.
Cultivate Curiosity. Encourage a home environment where every question is valued as an opportunity for exploration and learning. By fostering a setting where curiosity is encouraged, you demonstrate that seeking knowledge is a positive and essential part of daily life. This approach helps your child feel safe and supported in their quest to understand the world around them. It's important to answer their questions enthusiastically and, when possible, explore the answers together.
Lead by Example Show your dedication to lifelong learning by actively pursuing your educational goals. If balancing multiple responsibilities has kept you from furthering your education, consider the flexibility of online programs. Getting a degree in psychology, for instance, enables you to delve into how minds operate and how emotions influence behaviors, empowering you to offer better support to those in need. Demonstrating your commitment to education enriches your skills and serves as a powerful lesson to your children about the value and impact of continual learning.
Blend Hobbies and Learning. Integrating your child’s hobbies into their academic learning can make education a more enjoyable and relatable experience. This approach allows them to see the practical application of their studies. It encourages them to engage more deeply with the material, reinforcing that learning can be a personal and enjoyable journey. Connecting academic concepts to their interests makes learning more dynamic and relevant. This method helps solidify abstract concepts by linking them to familiar activities, enhancing retention and understanding.
Learn Through Play. Utilize games and playful activities to introduce and reinforce new concepts. This method makes learning engaging and less intimidating, allowing your child to explore complex ideas in a fun and supportive environment. Games also promote problem-solving skills and creative thinking, which are essential for academic success. Playful learning is particularly effective in keeping young learners eager and attentive. Incorporating educational games provides a hands-on learning experience that is both informative and enjoyable.
Expressive Learning. Allow your child to express what they have learned in various creative forms such as drawing, writing stories, or building models. This flexibility in expression helps them internalize their learning and discover their preferred methods of communication, which can boost confidence and enjoyment in their educational journey. Encouraging diverse forms of expression caters to different learning styles and reinforces understanding through creativity. This variety keeps learning exciting and promotes a deeper connection with the material.
Growth Mindset. Teach your child that intelligence is not fixed but can grow with effort, persistence, and the right strategies. Emphasizing a growth mindset encourages them to embrace challenges, persevere through difficulties, and view setbacks as opportunities to learn and improve. This mindset fosters resilience and a positive attitude towards learning challenges. Instilling this belief early on helps children view learning as a continuous, evolving process rather than a finite achievement.
 Navigating Bumps in the Road. There will be bumps in the road on yours and your child’s life journey. When your child is frustrated, rebellious, or acts out, use your calming voice and active listening to help him calm down. If necessary, encourage him to be still and to breathe deeply, role modeling for him. Help him turn his crisis into a learning opportunity with positive psychology. Help him turn “what ifs” (anxiety) into “I wonders” (curiosity), with expected positive outcome, to promote his learning. For example, “What if I don’t get it right?” becomes “I wonder when I will get it right.” Help him soar with positive expectations in the face of adversity.
Praise Effort Over Results. Finally, focus on praising the effort, strategies, and processes your child employs rather than just the outcomes. This shift in focus helps build resilience and a positive attitude towards continuous learning, which are essential traits for academic and personal success. Celebrating effort over perfection encourages children to persist even when faced with difficulties and to find joy in learning. This approach nurtures a healthy perspective where the value of education is seen in the effort and growth, not merely in the final result.
In fostering a love for learning, parents lay the foundation for their children's future, equipping them with the tools to navigate the complexities of life with confidence and curiosity. We can ensure our children grow into lifelong learners by taking active steps to make learning enjoyable and integral to daily life. Let’s help them see that pursuing knowledge is a joyful and enriching path.
 
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