does happy talk mean you are a happy person?

​      Today is my fifth and final podcast in a series where we’ve looked at each of five mental pathways you can adopt to smooth your healing journey from adversity to resilience. Previously, I shared with you these pathways:

1. Your journey away from focusing on what’s wrong to embracing what’s right.
2. Your journey away from a one-and-done mindset, which generates instability, to become more resilient.
3. Your journey away from believing the sky is falling, which breeds fear, to embracing critical thinking.
4. Your journey away from a consumer-generated perspective to gratitude thinking.

This series concludes with adopting your final mental pathway:
    5. Your journey from happy talk, which breeds mindlessness, to mindful thinking.              Happy talk sounds like fun. Going to a bar after work, socializing,
catching up with friends. When you are stress free, you can let go, be you, and enjoy the moment’s pause in your hectic life. When you are trying to get unstuck from a stressful, depressive, anxious, downward spiral of adversity, happy talk is not your friend.
          My dad, many years ago and a very wise, gentle man, shared with me one of his secrets to healthy relationships. “Jon,” he counseled, “in this world, there is a lot of drivel, meaningless small talk. It implies that you are happy, but are you? If you want meaningful, intimate emotional relationships, always say what you mean and mean what you say.” Wise counsel.
          When you are stuck and trying to soar, happy talk breeds mindlessness. Instead, move toward mindful thinking. Mentalligent psychotherapy (MPT) helps you do that. As an MPT therapist, you weave together for your patient the healing strategies of mindfulness, positive psychology, and cognitive behavioral interventions.
On your healing journey, happy talk is pretend, guessing what you think the other wants/needs from you, and as such, can be dishonest of you. Being mindful means staying in the now, being present with yourself and others, sharing your feelings as they come up, enjoying the moment.
          Add to that by weaving in elements of positive psychology, such as focusing on what’s right, rather than on what’s wrong, being grateful for the things and people in your life that contribute to helping you feel richer.
          Add to these elements’ helpful cognitive behavioral strategies, such as keeping a daily feelings journal, where you can account for positive shifts in your mood, writing letters of appreciation to special people in your life, keeping and clearing to-do lists to track your healing journey.
          These and other strategies for soaring on your healing journey are chronicled in my new book: The Healing Journey: Overcoming Adversity on the Path to the Good Life. You can find your copy on AmazonBooks.com at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CY9PQXMZ.
Blessings,
Dr. Jon

---