THEREFORMYKIDS.COM
  • Home
  • About
    • Counseling
  • Books
    • Teachable Moments
    • Leader's Study Guide
    • Resources
  • Speaking
    • Podcast
    • Radio
    • Ask Dr. Robinson
  • Blog
  • Contact

Boundaries and Goldilocks

5/25/2017

0 Comments

 
Picture
You remember the children’s story about Goldilocks and the Three Bears. This little girl was playfully skipping through the woods when she came upon a cabin. She looked through the windows and around the cabin, finding no one to be at home. The door was unlocked, so she went inside. It was about lunchtime and she found bowls of porridge on the kitchen table. Since no one was there to stop her, she helped herself. Of the three bowls she tasted, one was too hot, one too cold, and one just right.

         The process of setting boundaries for your child has a bit of the Goldilocks story in it. They need to be just right in order for your child to grow in security, worth, and responsibility.
         Mom meant well when she dressed 7 year old Jody to go outside and play. She layered her clothes, lathered her with sunscreen, and gave her a laundry list of what she could do and not do in the yard with her friends. As soon as Jody wiggled from her mama’s grasp and ran outside, she jumped into a mud puddle, got wet and filthy, and ruined her play clothes. That earned her a spanking, a bath, and quiet time in her room.
         Mom’s boundaries for Jody were too strict. At Jody’s age, mom could have asked what she thought she should wear and do outside today. Take her suggestions, active listen her feelings, and problem-solve with wise counsel. Jody may have known what to do, but with her mom’s overparenting, Jody’s response was a resounding “I’ll show you!!”
Seven year old Tim’s mom handled the same situation differently. “Mom, I’m going outside to play with my friends.” “Okay, son,” his mom called out from her computer where she was paying bills. “Just be careful and be back for dinner.” Tim’s mom’s boundaries were too lenient, giving him too much responsibility and putting him in charge of his actions. This underparenting is a recipe for anxiety, insecurity, and limit-testing.


0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    View my profile on LinkedIn


    View my profile on LinkedIn

    Archives

    January 2023
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    February 2022
    October 2021
    July 2021
    August 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    November 2019
    October 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015

    Categories

    All
    Active Listening
    Adulthood
    Authority
    Behavior
    Communication
    Confrontation
    Consultive Parenting
    Dealing With Frustration
    Depression
    Discipline
    Empathy
    Family
    Family Leadership
    Hormones
    Mood
    Parenting
    Personal Responsibility
    Problem Solving
    Proverbs
    Rebellion
    Relationships
    Responsibility
    Self Care
    Servant Parenting
    Stages
    Stress
    Teachable Moments
    Transitions
    Worry

    RSS Feed

Teachable Moments - Available NOW


Contact

706-308-7403

Speaking

Click for upcoming dates.

Email

jonrobinson00@bellsouth.net
 © 2018. All Rights Reserved.
  • Home
  • About
    • Counseling
  • Books
    • Teachable Moments
    • Leader's Study Guide
    • Resources
  • Speaking
    • Podcast
    • Radio
    • Ask Dr. Robinson
  • Blog
  • Contact